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Meapless in Seattle/Transcript

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Part I

(The scene opens up with an aerial shot of the Earth. Theatrical music plays as text starts to pan across the screen in a style that is similar to the opening of a Star Wars film)
Narrator: A long time ago in a studio in Burbank, California, a ragtag group of animators made a fake trailer for a Meap sequel they never intended to make. Unfortunately, everyone wanted to see that episode so the animators were forced to write it and incorporate all these seemingly unrelated scenes.
(The scene shifts and the aforementioned trailer starts to play)

(Phineas, Ferb, and Meap are seen looking up towards the sky, just before a massive mechanical pillar smashes into their backyard. The scene shifts)
Mitch: (He is seen with blue orbs of fire in each hand) Hahahahaha! Aren't you a little young to save the universe?
Phineas: (The camera zooms in on the Earth from outer space, and Phineas and Ferb are seen equipped with high-tech visors and blasters in front a futuristic steel door) Yes. Yes, I am.
(The scene shifts. Meap puts on his pink helmet. The scene shifts. Ferb is holding on to Candace, who is dangling at the edge of an aircraft. Mitch's ship rams into Meap's ship from the side as they speed towards a metropolitan coastline. The scene shifts. Ferb is seen rappelling down into a metal pit. The scene shifts to Perry's lair)
Major Monogram: I want your hat on my desk!
(Perry throws his chair towards a monitor. The scene shifts to what looks like the inside of Meap's ship)
Doofenshmirtz: Balloony! (Balloony is wearing an armored suit with energy axes)
Mitch: Colin!
(The scene shifts. Suzy and Meap are engaged in an epic karate duel at a Bango-Ru convention)
Candace: What? Jeremy's going to be there!
(The scene shifts to a building that looks like the Seattle Space Needle)
Meap: Meap!
(The scene shifts back to the aerial shot of the Earth)
Narrator: I guess the joke was on them. We now present... (dramatically) Meapless in Seattle.


(The text fades and the camera pans upwards, then eastward, and finally horizontally downwards, revealing a mechanical antenna in deep space. The antenna is part of a much larger ship is that is in pursuit of Meap's ship. As the two ships navigate their way through an asteroid belt, the antenna breaks. The ships appear to be heading towards Earth. The scene shifts to the living room of the Flynn-Fletcher household)


Candace: Ready to go?
Stacy: Sure. So you're okay with not, you know, busting your brothers first?
Candace: Yeah, I've been spending all my time worrying about Phineas and Ferb. I used to have other things to worry about. Like... (dramatically) What? Jeremy's going to be there! I just need to broaden my anxieties.
Stacy: Yeah, I guess if you're going to have an unhealthy mind frame, it might as well benefit me. Now, the mall is waiting.
Candace: Yeah, and no more worrying about Phineas and Ferb. I mean, if I did half the things they do, I'd get so... busted.
Stacy: Uh-oh. I just lost you, didn't I?
Candace: Stacy! If I do what Phineas and Ferb are doing I would get busted, and them along with me. A sacrificial bust!
Stacy: I almost got you-
Candace: I can take the hint-
Stacy: -out the door-
Candace: but they'll never see it coming.
Stacy: -to the mall.
Candace: Muhahahahaha

(The scene shifts to the kitchen, where Linda is listening to a language tutorial)
French Audio Teacher: Où est la.
Linda: Où est la.
Candace: (sarcastically) Mom, if you need me, I'll be outside with Phineas and Ferb. And when you get a break from your French lesson, feel free to pop outside and check out what we're doing, okay?
Linda: Okay Candace honey. Oh, would you take the garbage out, it's over by the door.
Candace: Sure thing, Mom. (Candace walks out into the yard with a garbage bag)
Candace: Okay Phineas and Ferb, what are we going to do- (She gets squashed in between two giant pillows, dropping the garbage bag) today?
Phineas: Oh, sorry Candace. We're having a giant pillow fight.
Candace: Giant pillow fight? Perfect! Move over and give me a try. (She gets into the pilot's chair of one of the giant pillows)
Phineas: Sure Candace.
Candace: This ought to get mom out here.
Phineas: You know who else would love this?
Candace: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do that. Say where's Perry?
Phineas: Well I was going to say Buford, but where is Perry?


(The scene shifts to Perry's underground lair)
Major Monogram: Morning Agent P. Dr. Doofenshmirtz is on the move. We've tracked him to northwestern Washington. We need you to get up there and see what he's up to. Oww! Oh! My back! Carl, crack!
Carl: Cracking, sir. (Carl proceeds to crack Monogram's back)
Major Monogram: By the way, (in an angry tone) I want your hat on my desk! Because it rains a lot in Seattle, and I'd like to spray it with this cool new water-proofing treatment. Which reminds me, we've installed new unbreakable glass in your lair monitor. Go ahead, try it out. (Perry yanks out his chair and throws it at the screen. The chair shatters on impact against the monitor) Hmm, better order that unbreakable chair too, Carl.
Perry!


(The scene shifts back to the backyard, where Phineas and Ferb are watching Candace control one of the pillows)
Candace: Oh, look Mom. We are having so much dangerous fun with these massive pillows.
(Meap's ship lands in Phineas and Ferb's backyard, and Meap gets out)
Phineas: It's Meap!
Meap: Meap!
Phineas: What's wrong?
Meap: Meap!
(Mitch's pod walker appears and nearly crushes Phineas, Ferb, and Meap)
Phineas: (He points at the pod walker) Wow! Cool ship. Is that yours?
Meap: Meap!
Phineas: Say what now?
Meap: (Meap puts on translation mustache and clears his throat) RUN!
Isabella: (She appears at the entrance) Hi Phineas-
Phineas: (He grabs Isabella by the waist and runs out of the yard with Ferb and Meap) RUN! (They reach the front yard) Wait! Candace!
Candace: (She is still in the backyard controlling one of the pillow fighting machines, unaware that the pod walker is getting tangled up in its string) Mom?! Come on out and see all the fun we're having! (The pod walker trips and yanks her and the machine to the front yard) AHHHHHH!!!!
Linda: (comes out, though she does not notice Meap's spaceship) Okay Candace, what did you want me to see?

(The scene shifts to the front yard)
Phineas: I'm going back for Candace.
(Candace lands on the giant pillows in front of them)
Candace: What's going on?
Phineas, Ferb, Meap and Isabella: RUN!
(Candace screams as the pod walker fires a laser, and Meap loses his mustache in the process. They run towards the backyard)
Meap: Meap!
Isabella: Oh no Meap! You lost your translation mustache.

(In the backyard, they get into Meap's spaceship while Linda stands in front of them, with her back towards the spaceship)
French Audio Teacher: The spaceship is right behind you. Le vaisseau spatial est juste derrière vous.
Phineas: Hey look, there's Mom!
French Audio Teacher: Your children are climbing in the spaceship now.
Phineas: Hi Mom!
French Audio Teacher: Vos enfants monter maintenant dont vaisseau spatial.
Phineas: We're going to outer space!
French Audio Teacher: Oh for the love of, would you turn around?
Phineas: See ya!
French Audio Teacher: Oh pour l'amour de, vous de serait tournez?
Linda: Well when is that ever going to come up in conversation? (Meap's spaceship takes off)

(The scene shifts to the inside of Meap's ship)
Candace: (She is taking a video of herself with her phone) Hi mom, check me out, I'm flying away in an alien spaceship with Phineas and Ferb! I am so busted!
Meap's ship's computer: Autopilot engaged. (Meap presses a button, and a second translation mustache pops out of the dashboard. The words "Made in Georgia" are in placard at the bottom) Emergency Translation Mustache activated.
Meap: (looks back from the pilot's chair wearing the two piece mustache. He starts speaking in a southern accent) I beg your pardon for all the hustle and bustle kids. It's just that my planet needs your help!
Phineas: We'd do anything for you, Meap.
Meap: In a rather large nutshell, here's my problem: You see, where I come from cuteness is valued above all else... (There is a ripple dissolve into a flashback of Meap's planet) and the source of our planets cuteness is a very rare element called cutonium. And a very long time ago, back in the days of yore, a gentleman by the name of Zachariah Yore discovered a hidden underground vein of pure cutonium. Yore used this highly concentrated cutonium to turn himself into a being so dag-gum cute that no one could refuse him anything he desired. (Citizens of Meap's planet are taking jewelry and gold from what looks like a treasury and handing it over to Yore) But as we all know, absolute cuteness corrupts absolutely. (Yore turns evil) Yore quickly became a greedy, evil tyrant, who after a great war was eventually removed. Afterwards pure cutonium was deemed too dangerous, (The cutonium is extracted from Yore) and the last of it was gathered up in a special container, and blasted off the planet into deep space. However, a week ago, scientists discovered a long, long dormant trail of cuteness, leading away from our planet in the direction of Earth. (Via a telescope's point of view, a stream of purple matter is shown heading towards Earth. The flashback ends) Children, and Candace, I need your help. Someone else wants to lay his hands on the cutonium, and we have to find it first.
Phineas: No problem. Ferb and I can build another cute tracker with these parts. Of course this time we'll have to adjust the settings to ignore Meap's cuteness. (The camera pans right to Isabella frowning) Oh! And yours too Isabella.
Isabella: I don't need your charity. So how bad is this guy we're up against?
Meap: I think you're already acquainted with the scoundrel in question.

(The scene shifts to the Flynn-Fletcher household, where two of Mitch's androids are seen putting Meap's mustache on Mitch)
Mitch: Ha, those kids will lead me right to it! Just as I planned! (The two robots give blank stares) What? Wh-what's that look? That was my plan. (The robots look at the destroyed pod walker) Yes, e-even destroying the pod walker was part of was part of the plan! You know, I can deactivate the both of you, and two more just like you will take your place. (The androids clap nervously) That's better. Now let's get after those kids, before they get too far ahead of us. (Mitch's spaceship emerges out of the pod walker and he boards it)
He's Mitch, but some people call him Big Mitch

(The scene shifts back to Meap's ship)
Phineas: I don't get it Meap. Did Big Mitch escape from prison?
Meap: Well, we come from a cute based society. By law the harshest judicial sentence we can pass down is a time-out.
Phineas: Nice work Ferb. The cute-tracker 2.0 is up and running.
Candace: So, where are we headed?
Phineas: It says the cutonium is somewhere in... Seattle.
Isabella: How will we know when we get to Seattle?
(Meap's ship passes a "Welcome to Seattle" signpost and enters a rainy, overcast area)
Ferb: We're here.
(The scene transitions to the group wearing raincoats in front of some coffee shops in Seattle)
Phineas: According to this, the cutonium is buried somewhere around these abandoned coffee houses.
Isabella: (Holding her sash) Well, it looks like the Unearthing Ancient Container patch I earned is finally going to come in handy.
Candace: Great. Let's find us some cutonium. The sooner we get started, the sooner we get busted.
(The group begins to dig up the area surrounding the coffee houses using some high tech equipment. They unearth vases, silverware, jewelry and sewage pipes)
Candace: (to her phone) Look Mom. We're digging up the entire northwest United States! You okay with that?


(The scene shifts to the inside of one of the coffee shops, where Dr. Doofenshmirtz is reading the newspaper)
Doofenshmirtz: Ah, Seattle. My home away from home. And to think, Perry the Platypus has no idea. He's, he's completely clueless about my little excursions up here. Ha, ha. That poor, blind, trusting pla- (Doofenshmirtz puts down his paper and sees Perry outside in the rain, staring at him. He runs to the "Dudes" room, where he sneaks out of the window and grabs an umbrella. However, Perry is outside the window waiting for him) AH! I'm not here! You are not seeing me! (Doofenshmirtz begins to run away, but falls face-first into a ditch) Oh Perry the Platypus, how long have you been... and look at that, it's, it's Peter the Panda, my ex-nemesis, what a coincidence, huh? (Perry turns to Peter, and then looks back at Doofenshmirtz, annoyed) I mean what is he doing here, in Seattle... his... hometown? And look he's got, he's got two coffees, one of which for sure, is not for me... it's not mine... (He moves his hands upwards, and in the process knocks some loose dirt away from the side of the ditch, unearthing the container of cutonium) because mine's right here. Look. See? (He drinks the cutonium) Ugh, ugh, that is not coffee. (As soon as he drinks the cutonium, Doofenshmirtz shrinks and becomes cute. Peter drops the two coffee cups in shock. Doofenshmirtz soon realizes what has happened) That's just great. What kind of a world are we living in, where a guy can't down the contents of a mysterious urn found in a trench, without undergoing major physical transmogrification? Really?
(Perry and Peter get out of the way as Mitch swoops down and picks up the container)
Mitch: At last the cutonium is, oh- no empty!
Doofenshmirtz: Hey! Dude! You're standing on my lab coat!
Mitch: (He picks Doofenshmirtz up) Oh-no, no, no, no! Did you actually drink the cutonium?
Doofenshmirtz: Oh, is that what that was? I totally cannot recommend it.
Mitch: Well, you're cute alright, but you should have become completely irresistible. How homely were you before?
Doofenshmirtz: Hey I know you! You're that Mitch guy from space. Put me down you best friend stealer!
Mitch: Well I suppose one container of cutonium is as good as any other. (to Doofenshmirtz, who is visibly annoyed) Want to go for a ride? Won't that be fun? Yes it will. (to his robots while pointing at Peter and Perry) Destroy them.
Doofenshmirtz: Wow! You're strict.
(Peter and Perry fight with two of Mitch's robots)


Phineas: (Looking at the cute-tracker 2.0) The cute signal's emanating from over there. And Big Mitch has it!
Meap: My word! Something must be done, y'all!
Mitch: Soon the whole world will be mine!
Doofenshmirtz: If you don't let me down I'l-
(Doofenshmirtz is taken from Mitch's hands by Phineas and Ferb's digging equipment. He is brought towards the kids in a pipe)
Isabella: (looking at Doofenshmirtz) Oh, he's so cute!
Phineas: Yep, he's definitely the source of the signal.
Isabella: Let's get to the ship.
Candace: (to her phone) Hi mom, check us out!
Mitch: To the ship! (They enter the ship)
Doofenshmirtz: (as he falls from the pipe into Meap's ship) Woohoo! Whee!
Phineas: (No longer wearing his raincoat) Gotcha! (to Meap) Come on, punch it Meap. Let's get out of here!
Mitch: Oh no you don't!
(Meap's ship begins to fly away, with Mitch's ship hot on its tail. They speed out of Seattle back towards Danville)
Phineas: Mitch is gaining!
Mitch: I have you right where I want you.
(The two ships bump against each other, and Candace almost falls out, but is saved by Ferb)
Candace: (to her phone) Hi Mom. Look, I'm in mortal danger! Say hi Ferb. (Ferb waves, and pulls Candace back into Meap's ship. A tractor beam emanating from Mitch's ship stops them from moving any further)
Meap: My word! A tractor beam! Hold on children, this ship is jumpin' like a June-bug on a hot chicken!
(The ship escapes the tractor beam momentarily, but gets caught in it upside-down in the process. The hatch on Meap's ship opens, and Doofenshmirtz and Meap fall out and plummet to the ground)
Meap: Well my little friend, it looks we're about to meet our untimely demise.
Doofenshmirtz: Yeah, speak for yourself, I'm going to try to land on you, so you'll break my fall.

Part II

Meap: My word, we've been fallin' for a long time!
Doofenshmirtz: Oh, a joke about the commercial break, yeah, that's how I want to spend my last few seconds.
Meap: (He lands on the space needle, and loses his moustache in the process) Meap!
Doofenshmirtz: (He is still falling) Oh look, his mustache fell off, and, and I didn't think today could get any weirder!
(A large mechanical arm grabs Doofenshmirtz. It is part of a ship, which is being flown by Peter and Perry)
Peter and Perry!
Doofenshmirtz: Nice try, but the mustache thing was still weirder.
(A tractor beam pulls Doofenshmirtz out of the hand's grasp, and into Mitch's ship)
Mitch: I'll take that, thank you very much. (Mitch cackles as his ship flies off into space)


Meap: (The scene shifts back to Meap, who is still on the Space Needle) Meap!
Phineas: (They fly towards the needle with the hatch of their ship open, unaware of Meap on top of the Space Needle) Meap! We lost him. (They see Meap, who promptly gets into the ship) Hop in. Big Mitch grabbed the cutonium. (The hatch of the ship closes) Do you know where he's going?
Meap: Meap! (He looks at a glass panel which reads "Backup Emergency Translation Mustache". He breaks the panel, puts the mustache on, and starts speaking in an elderly English accent) He's heading back to my home planet. I must warn them! (speaking into a radio) Red Alert! Red Alert! Mitch has the cutonium, and he's on his way there. You must rally the troops, and head him off at the evil fortress. This is war!
Female Meap Operator: Meap?
Meap: Do pardon, forgot I have this silly thing on. (He takes off the mustache) Meap!
Female Meap Operator: (gasping) Meap! (She hands her notes to the Head of Radio Operations. The scene shifts to a military command room)
Head of Radio Operations: Meap! (to the Secretary to the War Council) Meap!
Secretary to the War Council: Meap! (whispering to the Lieutenant General of the Meap Army) Meap.
Lieutenant General of the Meap Army: Meap! (He hits a red button sounding an alarm)
Alarm: Meap! Meap!

(Song: "Wee Wee Wee")
We we we we (whee!)
Are going to war (We're going to war!)
We're going to war (We're going to war!)

We we we we (whee!)
Are going to war (We're going to war!)
We're going to war (We're going to war!)

De- de- de- de- de- de- de-
Destroy our enemies!
La- la- la- la- la- la- la-
Let's bring them to their knees!

We we we we (whee!)
Are going to war (We're going to war!)
We're going to war (We're going to war!)

We we we we (whee!)
Are going to war (We're going to war!)
We're going to war (We're going to war!)

(Throughout the course of the song, the "Meap Army" was shown getting ready for war, They assemble outside Mitch's fortress and start to bombard it with artillery shells. The scene shifts to Peter and Perry's ship flying towards the evil fortress. Once they arrive, the two agents melt away a part of the fortress's walls and break in. The scene shifts to Meap's ship, which is also flying towards the evil fortress)
Meap: There it is. My home world.
Isabella: Meap! Your planet's so cute! Except, I guess, for that evil-looking fortress under that ominous cloud.
Meap: Unfortunately, that's where we are going.
Candace: So, uh, do we have a plan, or are we just going to go all willy-nilly, and barge into that bad, scary place?
Phineas: You know, willy-nilly barging is a plan, of sorts.


(The scene shifts to Mitch holding Doofenshmirtz as he enters a chamber inside the fortress)
Mitch: Here we are. The extraction chamber.
Doofenshmirtz: Seriously? Y-you have an entire chamber reserved just for extracting things? That, that really comes up that often in your life? The extraction of things from other things.
Mitch: Look, I don't have to justify my life choices to you.
Doofenshmirtz: You know you can drop the whole "bad guy" spiel. (Mitch's robots strap Doofenshmirtz onto a metal panel) I'm actually willingly going along with this, in case you hadn't noticed, but, yeah, okay, you're a bad dude, cool, whatever, I get it.
Mitch: (laughing manically while holding blue orbs of fire) When the extraction is over, then you will see just how bad a dude I really a- (The blue fire starts to burn his left hand) AH! Put it out! Put it Out! Put it out! (One of his robots extinguishes the fire with a fire extinguisher) Okay, now that was... embarrassing. I, I'm going up to prepare the machine, while you two finish up here. Personally I hate the smell of extraction. (Mitch leaves)
Doofenshmirtz: Wait, what does it smell like?


(The scene shifts to Meap's ship parked at a loading bay in Mitch's fortress)
Isabella: (She is putting on a pair of boots whilst talking to Meap, who is taking mirrors out of a box) Meap, why are you taking the mirrors?
Meap: (He hands her a mirror) Better safe than sorry.
Isabella: Okay.
Candace: (She is wearing a helmet) I don't know, Phineas. That door looks pretty solid. Are you going to try to hack the locking mechanism, or crack the code sequence?
Phineas: (He and Ferb are standing in front of a futuristic steel door equipped with high-tech visors and blasters) Yes, yes I am. I think the sequence is, (he pushes a red button with his blaster and the door promptly opens) push the big red button. (They enter the fortress)


(The scene shifts to the cutonium being poured back into the special container)
Doofenshmirtz: (Though he is still strapped to the metal panel, he has changed back into his usual form) Back to my old self. That, you know, that wasn't so bad. In fact I rather enjoyed large portions of that process. (Two robots load the container into a pneumatic tube, which sends it to an upper floor) Hmm, extraction. Who knew? (Peter the Panda and Perry the Platypus appear at the back of the metal panel) Peter the Panda! And Perry the Platypus! You're working together to rescue me? Oh that's really nice of you. (The two robots notice the agents and begin to advance towards Doofenshmirtz) Uh-oh. Hey guys? A little help here. (Peter and Perry pivot the metal panel upwards, which sends the robots crashing through the wall. More robots start to stream out of hatches in the walls of the chamber) This is some rescue. (Peter, Perry and Doofenshmirtz run away from the robots)


(The scene shifts to Mitch walking along a platform towards the center of a large chamber, where there is a machine waiting for him)
Mitch: Yes! My machine is fully charged with cutonium.
Meap: (He and the rest of the group are on a balcony overlooking the chamber) Hold it right there, Mitch.
Mitch: Meap! How did you get here?
Meap: With the help of Team Phineas. (He gestures to the rest of the group)
Candace: I never agreed to that name.
Mitch: You're too late. (Mitch's head vanishes from the top of his suit. A few seconds later, he reappears at the left foot of his suit as a much smaller, "Meap sized" alien) Not even you can stop me from becoming the cutest being in the universe.
Phineas: I didn't know he could do that.
Meap: Neither did I.
Mitch: (Mitch, who is standing on an elevated platform, is talking to his suit) Don't just stand there. Get them. (to the group) Boy are you going to get it now, when... (Mitch starts talking to his suit, which is finding it hard to reach the group) No! On your right! The ramp on your right! (Mitch's suit goes down the left ramp) Your other right! Yeah, when he eventually arrives up there you are in big trouble. In the meantime, behold the creation of the most adorable creature in the universe. Me!
(Mitch pulls a lever and his machine charges up. A bright, purple light envelopes his body and he floats upwards)
Meap: Oh no! He's done it! Whatever you do, don't look upon him in that state. You'll become transfixed by his cuteness and he'll gain complete control over you.
(Everybody shields their eyes, except Phineas, whose pupils dilate. Mitch transforms into a floating, caped, cute being and Phineas becomes hypnotized by Mitch's cuteness. He starts looking at Mitch in a transfixed state)
Phineas: Awwwww...


(The scene shifts to Doofenshmirtz, Perry and Peter running down a corridor away from Mitch's robots. Peter is behind Doofenshmirtz, while Perry is in front of him)
Doofenshmirtz: I just realized something about myself; apparently I run faster than a panda bear, but not quite as fast as a platypus. Eh, who knew? You really do learn things about yourself in times of crisis. Wait, wait, turn left up here. That door must be the way out. (They reach a door, which opens to reveal Balloony in an armored suit. Baloony is holding energy axes) Balloony, it's you! Oh boy am I glad to see you. (The robots stop chasing them) Chill guys, Balloony and I go way back. So Balloony it's a good thin- (Balloony swings one of his energy axes at Doofenshmirtz) Well it's been nice catching up, but uh- RUN! (Doofenshmirtz and the agents run away) I think I misjudged his devotion!


(The scene shifts to the Meap army, which is still bombarding the entrance of the fort. The door eventually breaks and the army moves in)
Meap Army: We we we we (whee!)
Are going to war (We're going to war!)
(From the platform, Mitch looks down at the Meap army, which instantly becomes hypnotized by his cuteness)

(The scene shifts back to the balcony)
Phineas: Aww, look at the little guy. What's the fastest way I can transfer all my assets into his name?
Candace: (To her phone in a panicked tone) Mom, things look pretty bleak. We may not be back after all. Phineas is in a cute trance. Mitch turned himself really adorable and defeated the entire Meap Army. There's no one left to-
Meap: (He takes off his translation mustache) Meap! (Meap grabs a mirror and swings down to the platform to confront Mitch. Meap looks at Mitch through the mirror, so as not to become hypnotized. Then, just as Mitch fires a purple death ray, Meap closes his eyes and fires a rainbow death ray. The two rays meet in the middle)
Phineas: Aww, they're blasting away at each other with really cute death rays.
(Mitch's suit finally arrives at the balcony and starts to chase Candace, Ferb and Isabella around, while Phineas continues to stare at Meap and Mitch fighting)


(The scene shifts to Doofenshmirtz using a shield to deflect the robot's lasers. Peter and Perry have been pinned down by the robots)
Doofenshmirtz: Balloony, please help me. Balloony! Oh, don't let me go like I did with you. Balloony, what ever happened to us? (Suddenly, Balloony fights and wipes out nearly all of the robots attacking Doofenshmirtz) Balloony! I knew deep down inside you were still my best friend. Think of all the good times we can have, now that we- (One of the robots which survived Balloony's onslaught fires a laser, popping Balloony) Nooo! (Balloony collapses to his knees, falling into Doofenshmirtz's arms) No. Balloony. Stay with me, I- (Peter and Perry, who are now free, look at each other and approach Doofenshmirtz, who is holding a deflated Balloony) I'm not going to let you go a second time. Balloony! I can feel my heart... popping.


(Meap and Mitch are fighting. Meap retreats and hides behind a pillar, but Mitch suddenly appears behind him. Meap gets thrown back as he becomes hypnotized by Mitch's cuteness. Mitch cackles as Meap lies on the platform. The others are still running away from Mitch's suit, except for Isabella, who kneels down next to Phineas and uses a mirror to look at the platform)
Isabella: Oh no! Meap needs our help, Phineas, Phineas! (She drags him down) Come on Phineas, snap out of it! Phineas, Meap is down, he's been out-cuted. (She takes off her helmet and briefly swishes her hair from side to side) What are we gonna do? Phineas?
(The camera focuses on Isabella before returning to Phineas, who, for a second, is still in a cute trance. Then, his eyes refocus as he regains control of his senses)
Phineas: Is-Isabella. Hey wait a minute, Isabella we've had a secret cute weapon all this time. You!
Isabella: Me?
Phineas: Don't you see? You can take him. He's only cute on the outside, but your cuteness goes right to your core.
Isabella: So what you're saying is, you think I'm cute?
Phineas: It's a scientific fact. (He picks up the Cute-tracker 2.0) I had to put an 8000-ohm resistor on the cute-tracker just to keep you from burning it out.
(There is a long, awkward pause as Phineas fidgets and pushes buttons on the Cute-tracker 2.0)
Isabella: (In a slightly annoyed tone) Close enough. I'm on it.
Phineas: You can do it Isabella, just be yourself!

(Isabella swings over to Mitch, yelling as she touches down hard on the platform)
Isabella: Hey Mitch.
(Mitch turns around. Isabella also turns around, though she is surrounded with a pink flashing aura)Whatcha doin'? (The last syllable echoes in the chamber)
Mitch: Meap! (He gets thrown backwards towards a wall, discharging his cuteness in the process. He puts on the translation mustache) Ow.
(The Meap army regains control of itself, and cheers. Meap walks over to Mitch and puts on the translation mustache)
Meap: Children, you did it. You saved not only my planet, but the entire galaxy from Mitch's adorable yet evil plan. (Phineas and Ferb slide down onto the platform) On behalf of my people, I thank you.
Phineas: It was our pleasure Meap.
Candace: (She slides down onto the platform) And I've got it all right here on my phone.
Mitch: (He begins to run away) Meap.
Candace: Hey! He's- Oh no! (She searches her pockets, but is forced to throw her phone towards the bay door. It hits a red button, falls to the floor, and breaks. The door slides downward, trapping Mitch as two Meap guards surround him) Oh no you don't!
Mitch: (He sighs) Meap.
Meap: Good work, Candace. He's going to get a serious time out now. Fifteen, sixteen minutes.

(The scene shifts to the front yard of the Flynn-Fletcher household, where the destroyed pod walker is being towed away. In the background, Meap's ship is seen landing)
Phineas: Well, it sure is great to be home. (The scene shifts to Meap's ship parked in the backyard) Thanks for the ride Meap.
Meap: Friends, I can never thank you enough for helping me save my planet.
Phineas: Our pleasure. And I think we all learned a valuable lesson today, but we all know what it is so why waste our time restating it?
Isabella: Bye Meap!
Meap: Farewell my friends!
Phineas: Bye!
Isabella: Goodbye! (Meap's ship takes off)
Phineas: Bye Meap!

(Meap's ship takes off just before Linda walks out)
Linda: Candace, I thought I told you to take that garbage out. You are so busted, young lady.
Candace: Of...course I am.
Phineas: Hey! Where's Perry?


(The scene shifts to Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated. Doofenshmirtz has a disheartened look on his face when Perry walks in)
Doofenshmirtz: Oh, Perry the Platypus, I'm sorry there's nothing to foil, I, I'm still down about- (Perry holds up Balloony, who has been patched and fully blown up) Balloony! (An instrumental version of My Wettest Friend starts to play to a montage of Doofenshmirtz and Balloony spending time together)

End credits

(A trailer starts to play. It opens up with another aerial shot of the Earth, which promptly shifts to two spaceships ramming into each other)
Narrator: And now, a trailer for an episode we also have no plan to make.
(The scene shifts. Baljeet is water-skiing)
Baljeet: Pay attention up there!
(The scene shifts. Candace is wearing a birthday hat at what appears to be a party in the backyard. Jerry the Platypus is seen waving)
Candace: Jerry the Platypus?
(The scene shifts. Phineas and Ferb are in the city)
Phineas: Ferb, aren't those extinct?
(The scene shifts. Meap's ship is parked in the backyard, and Meap is walking away from it calmly. The ship explodes. The scene shifts. Jeremy is walking through church doors wearing a suit)
Jeremy: As a matter of fact, I object to this union.
(The scene shifts. Doofenshmirtz is in a bus)
Doofenshmirtz: (song "Sucker for Mass Transit") Yes, I'm just a guy who's a sucker for the sounds of mass transit.
(The scene shifts. Meap and Suzy are fighting at a Bango-Ru convention in a style that is identical to their duel in the first trailer. Theatrical text rolls across the screen)
Narrator: The Chronicles of Meap, Episode 42.
(The scene shifts to a structure that looks like the Millennium Gateway Arch in St. Louis, Missouri)
Meap: Meap!
Narrator: Meap Me in St. Louis.
Doofenshmirtz: (The scene shifts back to Doofenshmirtz in the bus) Hey, wasn't that Suzy stuff supposed to be in this one?

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